Maybe if you don’t buy the Safeway clearance condoms you won’t need the Safeway clearance paternity test. instagr.am/p/C0VC1oEx_yQ/

I’m having a devil of a time getting a handle on my email. instagr.am/p/C1Hz5fIuTc2/

I couldn’t figure out how to get to the back of my eyebrows (and do I really need to worry about their back?) and then I turned the card over and did, indeed, see tips there on the back on how to keep my brows looking beautiful. instagr.am/p/C1NQHdDgAzO/

This is the time of day when our cats like to relax. #catsofinstagram #nachokitty #prettyprettyprincess instagr.am/p/C3F5OJCOEL1/

Trump’s lawyers just admitted he lost the 2020 election.

This is pretty amazing

Truth. Please just stay home.

Spiro Agnew, you will not owe history an apology. Even though I have strong ethical disagreements with you, there’s no denying that as the first Greek origin Vice President — from Maryland no less — you have inspired many others to be proud of their heritage & serve

Yeah, Doug. Where’s your bug?

My favorite project for the DNC by far - cards and boxes all union printed! 😝✊

I can’t compete with this

Stephen King Nah homie. All gas 😎

I’ve been saying this for years: Every major airport in America is leaving money on the table by not having a nail salon

Why don’t you leave the t-shirts to me, Jimmy, and you can go back to working on dying soon

Referring to NewYork City as the “Big Richmond.”

Happy birthday, Boy-mou ❤️

RICHMOND IS THE NEW YORK CITY OF THE EAST COAST

I hope Meghan McCain gets sent to heaven when she dies so she never gets to see her dad again