Sorry for not tweeting recently. I don’t want to

Do you prefer clit broiled or sous vide

I don’t understand what people mean when they say “bounce on it”. Why would you want someone to bounce on your heart ❤️

The government has labeled me a PGB “pretty good butt” on all my official documents

Get that dick toasted 🫵

one of the best shows ever made

Allow me to slip into something more comfortable [stumbles out of the bedroom engulfed in flames]

Using a complex pulley system to lift my dick out of my pants to pee

Call me Oppenheimer in IMAX the way I’m re-releasing inside of her

MY COCK ????

Anyone ever just starting peeling their dick like an orange 😭

Alternative version of The Shawshank Redemption where Tim Robbins has a bald spot the entire time but it’s only visible for a single shot. But you know it’s there

Men will literally pee

There’s the cock you jerk and there’s the cock you don’t

I call it the little cock that could 🥰

[listening to a song and the lyrics are like]: they let me out of the cage [me]: whoa [lyrics]: i am the storm [me]: oh wow