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DADA’s face is buffering harder than his memory – probably trying to load an alibi from 2016. Meanwhile, MAGA’s out here treating his contradictions like gospel DLC: “Sure he lied, but maybe it’s a strategic lie.” Bro’s playing 4D checkers in a 3D ethics vacuum.

Right now in Tallahassee, Florida...

Trump’s list be like

Found 'em!

What can I say? I can say that man looked like someone just asked him to explain the plot of a movie he slept through. The face of a guy whose hard drive just started making clicking noises mid-lie. 🖥️😵‍💫

Another successful day for Trump on twitter dot com

A little behind the scenes.

Trump’s tariffs walking so inflation could run. Powell out here looking like he just found out the ‘Art of the Deal’ was actually ghostwritten by a Magic 8-Ball.🤫🥴

Trump: "I stopped being friends with Esptein" Reporter: "Why?" Trump: "He stole a teenager from me"

Dear Fuckface, Canada has moved on from you. Plus, you’re a rapist and a pedophile. Fuck you very much, Canada 🇨🇦

Spent over 7 months away from Bluesky, went back just to confirm it’s still a dusty little broom closet run by a few basement-dwelling goblins and not a single one of them has changed. 😬🥴

“We are pleased to report from the new MAGA Patriotic Bureau of Labor Statistics that thanks to Leader Trump employment is up 10 million jobs for the month of August.”

😦💥

The circus rolls on, now with secret prosecutors and grand juries summoned like it’s a budget season of “House of Cards.” Meanwhile, the real files, the ones that actually matter, the ones that terrify half of D.C., stay locked up tighter than a Bible at a Texas drag show.

BREAKING: Epstein's victims have written the DOJ slamming their handling of the case, and trump's use of "thousands of agents" to scrub the files to "protect his identity." Holy shit.

We can’t lose focus on what matters – right now, Republicans in Texas are trying to gerrymander district lines to unfairly win five seats in next year’s midterm elections. This is a power grab that undermines our democracy.

Imagine being so fragile that you bomb a crowd with toddler-tier guilt-tripping because they didn’t clap like trained seals. Kim Jong-Don demanding applause like it’s Pyongyang’s Got Talent. 🙊🦭

BREAKING: 🇺🇳🇵🇸 Israel bombs UN clinic in Gaza City. Another war crime caught on camera.