When you tell Pieter Groenewald you only have Pepsi when he orders a brandy and coke.

Well done Tatjana Smith! We knew your training in the Fire Pool would lead to success.

Which South African politician would you want to be your teacher and what subject would they teach?

We welcome Comrade Floyd Shivambu to the Saxonwold Shebeen! May his card never decline and his firepool forever be full!

We are looking forward to opening up our new pub in Cape Town. It will be based in the MK Party caucus room.

We look forward to welcoming Brian Molefe and Pappa Penny as regular members in very good excellent and most wonderful standing. We have created a statue for our founder in chief, Brian Molefe, out of toilet paper rolls and old VBS debit cards.

Carl Niehaus just ran into the bar and shouted: “my blood is always red” at Shivambu and then ran out. No shit, Carl.

VBS actually stands for Very Brian Shivambu.

IN THE SOWETAN TOMORROW: Former SOE chiefs Molefe and Gama, linked to the Guptas, ascend to lawmaking with cloud of corruption charges above their heads.

No, we have not joined MK… Yet.

We had quite a jol for New Years. The former First Daughter and Floyd bought a round of tequila and then left the bill with Dali who refused to pay. It was an EFFup. We’ve recently decided to expand the and enjoyed welcoming our new comrades who have crossed the floor.

No VAT increase? No power!

VAT jou kak en loop.

What do you mean the ANC government has to take accountability?

The look Johan Rupert gives us when we run out of brandy and coke.

Acting President Angie Motshekga

We aren’t going ANYWHERE.

You’ve come to the right place!

Ramaphosa needs to appoint a Commission of Inquiry into the Springboks.

Our President is going through the most. Join us this weekend at the Saxonwold Shebeen for the G20 shot. You’ll order 20 shots but only 15 will arrive.