A red rocks concert 6 feet away from people? Fine by me

People really out here wearing two masks

Hey ye what do I have to do to stop receiving your ugly ass shoe emails

I miss treating weekdays like the weekend

Happy national gambling problem awareness month to literally all of my friends

Mental health should be more of a priority than gun control, sure assault rifles are unnecessary but that cats out of the bag, let’s focus on why people are doing these hateful acts

If there’s ever a scandal about me, *please* call it Elongate

This car has been parked in front of our house for over 3 months without moving, ID card and a plane ticket in the cup holder...this could be a great podcast in the making

LOOK AT THE NEW FISH THEY FOUND

You can’t preach female athletes should be paid more then not watch any female sports

I can’t even lie, I’m still mad Auburn Basketball got robbed in the final four game 😒😂 they win in the championship game EASILY 🤦🏾‍♂️‼️

Don’t sweat the petty stuff and don’t pet the sweaty stuff

Coach going for it on 4th down for the rest of the year

A million seconds is 11 days. A billion seconds is 32 years.

I’m back twitter

Salt bae needs to be canceled, fuck that dude

Christmas comes this time each year has got to be the dumbest lyrics of all time