2005 - 2025 🫡🕊️

myself, I feel very safe

this is the only movie I’ve seen that I think is cool to do these goofy engagement farmy clips for

texting my friends about my golf game the second the Karen Read verdict was announced

bro get a ROOM

In the words of Nelson Mandela: it always seems impossible until it’s done. My friends, it is done. And you are the ones who did it. I am honored to be your Democratic nominee for the Mayor of New York City.

pulled a hero’s shift yesterday, sent some passive aggressive teams messages this morning and was kicked back on the beach before 1 truly one of the greatest to ever tap the keys

Sly Stone has been gone for less than a month and they’re telling lies on his name💔

“that’s on me, I haven’t had time to read anything too closely lately”

Jelly Roll looks like a villain in the Barnyard universe

Tubi consistently has the best movie selection of any streaming service but you go to their front page and it’s just this

I tell tales of unbridled depravity and people are like “haha Jackson such a silly guy” but the second I mention that I sometimes eat arugula out of the bag I’m some type of freak all of a sudden

If you wake up with anxiety it’s because you’re in big trouble

you know what’s hotter than a fresh cup of mud brother? Hulk Hogan JC

they’d never let a man like this make popular music nowadays because of a lack of woke

O YES I am

giving a raggedy old pair of socks one last good day outside before they get sent to the farm