// two eps into this season and I’m just not feeling it 🤷🏻‍♀️

And I thought minimum security was noisy. I can’t even read in peace.

You’re always crying, Pipes.

Need to talk about it?

If you decide you need to, you know where to find me.

My cell mate vanishes every afternoon for half an hour. Swing by.

I can handle a shot or two if it gets me alone time with you.

Shhh, Pipes. Nobody is supposed to know about my hopeless romantic side. You’ll blow my cover.

✂️✂️✂️✂️

I could still snap you like a twig, Bieber.

Finally. Someone who knows who the /real/ daddy is around here.

Piper’s going to get jealous.

.. Are you trying to make me hurt you?

Is getting married in prison equivalent to getting married in Vegas?

I’m /so/ glad that everybody has moved on from the fact that my middle name is ‘Pearl’.

{Cough} I miss my prison fiancé: Piper Chapman. {Cough}

Finally some peace and quiet. Kickball practice time has its perks.

What’s a girl gotta do to get herself moved to Florida?

My old cell was way quieter. Badison snores.