The headline "Orcastrated attacks" was right there

every successful woman begins her day surrounded by at least 4 assorted beverages of varying temperatures

if you want to know what it’s like to work for corporate america, it’s mostly “how was your weekend” from Monday to Wednesday and “any weekend plans?” from Thursday to Friday

Begging knowledge base writers to add links such that they open up in another tab. No one wants to be taken to another page while they're also trying to follow your instructions! (Yes, I know about ctrl+click/scroll-wheel click.)

Back in the day your kids might inherit beautiful silver pieces and flatware. My hypothetical heirs will be gifted swag mugs, insulated cups, and water bottles from tech companies. 😌

Can we stop using "return to work" when what we really mean is "return to office"? We're not "returning to work," we've been working this entire time.

F in chat

Am I a hacker now?

me in 2010: wow 2023 will be so futuristic me in 2023:

A man walks onstage. The lights dim. The audience falls into excited hushes. A spotlight hits the man. He speaks. "Imagine, if you will, a future..." "A future where you can send emails..." "while wearing ski goggles with a cord running into your pants." The crowd roars.

I never restore my browser tabs. If I lose them from a restart then I rejoice that I am finally free from the prison of my own creation.

With search engines readily available my ability to retain information is so bad. If I look up a fact, probably not going to commit it to memory because it's easy to find again! Is it just me?

People who want access to corporate cards have never had to deal with actually tending to all of our receipts and invoices, providing justifications, and doing it all in a timely manner. I'd rather not buy anything at all.

When did tech companies decide that we want to watch famous people at their conferences? Maybe it's just me but I'd much rather hear about someone using the product for interesting things than a random celeb's inspirational talk?

Linux users when somebody wants to be paid for their labor

me: I'M A BAD BITCH 🔥🔥🔥 also me when my API calls fail for no explicable reason:

I would have simply added a robots.txt to the site.

I guess this is the new way: use a social media site until leadership decides it's not making enough money and sells it out completely for ads that ruin the UX, abandon ship slowly, adopt the new hot platform that hasn't prioritized profit yet, rinse and repeat.

Me when an end user's browser is slow: "Can you try clearing your cache?" vs Me when my browser is slow: "I guess I'll be using Firefox to access this site moving forward."