so we just had a soft pretzel with the spiciest mustard and they served it with tzatziki as well and let me tell you… mountains were moved

why the fuck did nobody tell me evanescence is on tour

i used to pray for times like this

electric cars are cool and all (except for teslas) but why the fuck do they have to make that noise when they’re in reverse

plur <3

i hope the twink my subway to work doing the bad romance choreo in full right now has a great day every day

Phillies debut the “Coldplay Kiss Cam”. Wait for it…

I also got this ick one time

reminder that Sharon Osbourne would throw hands for Ozzy Osbourne 😭 she got sued after this

i hope the two lesbians that are painting water color photos on their first date at our go to coffee shop live happily ever after

walked into Wawa and they were playing paramore this is the best day of my life

people who make it a point to acknowledge their half birthday are just as bad as Catholics and maga people

i don’t necessarily miss LA but I’d kill for a good taco rn

i just realized the great danes from the poker face music video are prob dead and now my night is ruined

i would go to war for soda water and bitters with a little lime

i played solitaire with this old diva named shirley during my flight to savannah and before we god off she grabbed my hand and said “promise me you’ll stay happy and healthy” 🥲

if we had a lesbian president shit would get SORTED & RESOLVED

requesting guest list for my dog pls