Can someone explain to me why I have to see this thing 200x a day?

I’m gonna give 10 random people that repost this and follow me $25,000 for fun (the $250,000 my X video made) I’ll pick the winners in 72 hours

I found myself on SandwichTok, and the amount of moaning coming from my room is probably concerning. Check out Lacey's video! #TikTok tiktok.com/t/ZT874C2Va/

It's 2024, Are we ready to admit we don't like turtles that much, or do I have to keep using paper straws?

My bottom deserves this type of luxury.

Me, waiting for a brain aneurysm to take me while my Teams and Outlook keep alerting me to new messages.

So does Samsung just reject everyone's trade-in? Everyone I know who bought the latest galaxy has had their phones sent back to them and lost $450.

I don't think I've ever gotten the shredded cheese from the bag to my mouth without making a huge mess.

That $14.5MM house I had favorited on zillow sold instead of waiting for me to save enough money.

I don't know who was supposed to be watching me, but they let me eat Doritos over a white comforter.

Pro tip: The Out of Order machines are much easier

Every time I hear the outlook notification sound.

I'm making someone take me to Joann's in their cybertruck.

My special skill is knowing how to get to the Cinnabon from any location in the mall.

I had a dream that IKEA had all-you-can-eat sweedish meatballs. Then I woke up to this nightmarish reality without all-you-can-eat meatballs.

I was drinking my wine when I saw this mirror and thought I had became a vampire. When I looked again, a black man was standing there looking back at me and I was pretty sure I had ɓecome a black vampire.

I need to stop going to stand-up comedy shows. The comedian always singles me out of the crowd. every 👏 single 👏 time

Derber rainber

I found a grey nose hair and now I can't decide if I should order the Barbie or My Little Pony themed casket.