What if mainstream media headlines were actually written like this?

If you wanna know how much can change in 5 years, back In 2019 these guys said they couldn’t breathe in a mask, but now they can’t shoot a woman in the head 3 times without one!

Have you ever seen a bubble freeze? I lived through Pennsylvania winters as a child I can't believe I never saw someone do this

Instead of lending out dollars to banks, the Federal Reserve should lend out Jerome Powell’s spine to Republican senators.

‘just comply’ is fascinating advice from people who tried to overthrow the government because they lost an election and threw a yearlong tantrum over being asked to wear cloth on their face

holy sh*t. this is hands down the coolest website i have ever found in my life. it's a live feed of the freaking Hubble Telescope AND James Webb Space Telescope. and the resolution is honestly so incredible i didn't think it was real. unbelievable. spacetelescopelive.org

The aurora borealis over Nuuk Greenland …

Okay, this is funny! 😆

Trump has finally brought unity to America and the world … everyone’s laughing at him.

🚨HOLY SMOKES: Danish MEP Anders Vistisen to Trump: “Let me put this in words you might understand: Mr. President, fuck off.” Europe is officially done pretending this is normal diplomacy.

Men: women expire after 25. Reality: that’s when adult brains fully develop and when we stop falling for your bullshit

🤣

Okay, here’s another one.

Trump's goal is to start a civil war... if his goal was deporting illegals, he would have sent those ICE agents to Florida and Texas.

80 days left. Onward to victory!❤️🤍💚

Just want to once again go on the record and say it was a bad idea to make the stupidest person alive the President of the United States

During the Vietnam War, Donald Trump received five draft-deferments: four for education and one for bone spurs in his heels. His father Fred, although he was of draft age during World War II, also did not enlist or serve. Trump’s paternal grandfather, Friedrich, was born in