Im too old to be drinking now. Went out Friday and I’m still dying Sunday afternoon 🫠🫠🫠🫠

I need the beach in my life

Reasons I date Jaraden: a little boy came up to him and asked him for some work to do because he wants a couple bucks to get an ice cream. And he asked him to help him move a branch on the end of our yard to the curb and gave him some money. I’m talking didn’t even move a step😂

Me: eating better, working out 4/5 days a week.. loses 12 pounds in 3 months. Bf: loses 12 pounds every time he shits

I can fall asleep in the car, at work, on a bench, in the club, after drinking coffee and energy drinks. I love my sleep. Buttt let it be when I need to fall asleep and I cannot 🙃

Payton Washington is in the ICU after she was shot for getting in the wrong car in Texas Kaylin Gillis was shot to death for driving into the wrong driveway in New York Ralph Yarl was shot in the head for ringing the doorbell at the wrong house in Missouri It’s the guns

serving is funny this lady was being a biotch to me so I faked it till I made it and she still bitched and left me zero lmaoooo then the other guest I had at the same time left me $50 and said I was delightful and the best 😇 Can’t please everyone 🫡

last night a guest asked me why i was “26 and still serving tables” right after she tipped me $355

Me 10 years in the service industry when it was suppose to be a little stop 🥴

Is it just me!? I don’t want to socialize in public spaces. I want to sit at the bar and drink. Don’t talk to me. Don’t start a fake convo with me. I don’t want to fake an effort. I don’t wanna meet new people. I’m having a grand ole time just me by myself!

Deep down inside I’m tired 🥲🥲🥲

Omg I drank too much pre workout last night and I thought I was gonna die. I had to inhale and exhale and put soothing music on to make myself calm down 🥴

My hand been itchy and BJ’s I know why 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑

I wish I had friends that would gym it up with me or go on hikes 🥲

My friend: those people thought we were talking shit about them Me: who!!? Friend: not telling you cause you’re gonna start something 🫢🤣🤣🤣

To buy this SHEIN cart order…or to not…😮‍💨

Me: quit overworking yourself…. Also me: has 2 jobs, got promotions, more responsibilities at home and work, small business owner, and new work opportunities 🙃🙃🙃🙃

I wouldn’t wish a bitter/miserable bm on my worst enemy

Idc what anyone says, any bm would be LUCKY to have me as their kid’s stepmom

I slipped and fell off a ladder. I was wet cold. When I walked out the freezer my manager asked me where I been my guest had been looking for me. I had passed out. Drone to the ER somehow..I had a concussion I couldn’t remember my name or address. 30 plus weeks preggo.😮‍💨