A Beer 4 The Shower (@abeer4theshower) 's Twitter Profile
A Beer 4 The Shower

@abeer4theshower

Beer. Comics. Parody. The two politically incorrect authors of some funny novels. Proprietors of abeerfortheshower.com .

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linkhttp://www.abeerfortheshower.com calendar_today10-06-2011 14:34:29

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A Beer 4 The Shower (@abeer4theshower) 's Twitter Profile Photo

With each decade of your life that passes, copy and paste Facebook statuses become less and less cute. ~*COPY AND PASTE IF YOU AGREE AMEN*~

A Beer 4 The Shower (@abeer4theshower) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Me: I am a responsible adult that has a lot of work to do this weekend. Stranger Things & Super Mario Odyssey: You sure about that, jackass?

A Beer 4 The Shower (@abeer4theshower) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Today's glowing review: "WHAT? BEER AT A SHOWER? WHY? I DONT LIKE BEER" -elderly woman that doesn't understand Facebook algorithms

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Today I turn 34. I don't want to be a pessimist, but I'm starting to think that dream of becoming an NFL linebacker is slowly fading out of my grasp.

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If there's anything dumber than falling asleep on your own arm, waking up in numb, confused panic, and then flopping your dead noodle arm around in agony while the pins and needles attack, I have yet to do it.

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I love how grandma stories always take a very dark, unnecessary turn but then end happily. "And my mother's farm, it was beautiful. She had to kill coyotes with a baseball bat, but the food, it was very fresh." #thankyouforsharing

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Just overheard on Walmart intercom: "Frodo, line 1. Frodo, line 1." *awkward pause* "I'm... sorry. PHOTOS, line 1. Photos, line 1." #highlightofmyday

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"Live, laugh, love. No boy is worth crying over, and the one who is won't make you cry." - Edgar Allan Poe "Don't believe everything you read on the Internet, you stupid bastard." - Abraham Lincoln, 1776

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❄️❄️It's our first big snow of the season, so you know what that means! ❄️❄️ ...Time to break out the tiny dog sweaters that make me feel like less of a man when I walk them.

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I wonder if the girl on Instagram fighting with numerous people in the comment section of an ad for Morton table salt realizes that her 118 rage-induced comments look a lot like hitting the Internet's rock bottom.