Sometimes when im cycling I get freaked out by my own free will. Like I am really in control of this thing, when I turn the wheel it changes direction. Not a suicidal thing at all but what if I just drove into the path of that lorry there, I could literally do that in seconds.

4 Stars is the gold standard film rating for me. The baseline. A 4 star movie can be outstanding, or just a lot of fun. Some movies exceed it & reach greatness, others fall short & thats OK too. But 4 stars is where they all begin their journey & where most of them end up as well

Debuting a short sleeved shirt in the office today. Does it make me look cool or does it make me look like a postman. Only my colleagues can decide that, it's out of my hands now. Let's see how this plays out.

An instant classic imo

I was at this event. I made my own sign that said 'Got Elbow?' to commemorate The Rock & me & my Dad wore matching American football shirts that said 'Austin 316' on them. Also, a female wrestler inexplicably flashed the crowd for some reason. Best night of my life, take me back.

When its sunny I sometimes walk past people drinking outside pubs & mourn that I cant do that anymore. Forgetting theres never been a point in my life where I could have a casual drink & it not end in chaos & destruction. Then I remember & feel gratitude for my sobriety once more

Name me something better than when you recommend a movie to a colleague & then they come in one day & tell you they've seen it. That shit is like liquid gold to me. Pleasure bonding with you like this brother. I love you by the way.

Bank holiday Mondays are so good because every day feels like we are fast forwarding the working week. It seriously feels like Tuesday right now, but its literally Wednesday. How good is that? Its basically Friday at this point, time to start winding down. Lets get it.

Mike Townsend At school we all went on a trip to a farm for PSHE and one of the scenarios there they showed us was genuinely a boy who fell in the corn grinder playing hide and seek and what to do. There was also a barn where they taught you not to take drugs from strangers.

When I started working at Warner I emailed an American colleague & mentioned a release coming out at '19:00' & he replied angrilly like 'why are you talking to me in military time' & I had no fking idea what he was going on about lol. Thats just 7pm man thats how we say the time.

Almost scrolled past this video but then I went back, pressed play, sat my ass down and I listened. I might need this information one day.

Dont really understand how signing a contract is so legally binding. Like can you say for sure that signature was me? Were you there in the room when I signed it? Did you get it on video? You cant prove a goddamn thing sir

Free Palestine 🇵🇸

Mike Townsend powerful

Security dude at work is drinking a cup of tea out of one of these Stella glasses. Incredible vibe. Enjoy buddy.

The assault on Rafah is another utterly despicable war crime.

As bombs rain down on a trapped and terrified population, we implore our government to find an ounce of humanity and end its complicity in this senseless massacre.

Wake up. This is not war. This is genocide.

Thought the couple above me were just like incredibly argumentative and weirdly patronising in the way they talk and shout demands at one another but I just realised they have a dog. They've been arguing with the dog not with each other! Love is back. Hope the dog is OK though.

Congratulations to anyone who booked tomorrow off work to give themselves an extra long bank holiday weekend. I didn't do that, but im happy that you did. You work so hard and you deserve this brother. Enjoy.

The assault on Rafah is genocide in action. Political leaders in the UK must call this for what it is, it’s a war crime. International action is needed to halt the attack. We need an urgent vote in Parliament to end the UK’s complicity in this & to end the arms sales to Israel

The 'evacuation' of Rafah is illegal. There are no 'humanitarian' or 'safe zones.' Civilians are being forcibly displaced to areas totally unsuitable to human habitation. This is a crime against humanity.