🔥The 9th Round of Easy Loan, Earn $40 Reward is in progress❗️ ⏰ Promotion Period: January 15th - Feburary 15th, 2025 👉 Register now and check more details at gate.io/campaigns/358

If anyone has any non-extenuating circumstances laying around I will pay top dollar

Dogs are great because they’re basically like 21% Samwise Gamgee, 17% stress ball, 12% Chewbacca, and 50% just happy to be here

Jack is concerned and he just wants you all to know he’s here to help

Me in the group chat after watching the most unhinged 173 message convo erupt all over my phone

So the worst genre is definitely dystopian nonfiction

Omg I love winter so much now give me that little tube of wax so my lips don’t bleed all over the snow

When I’ve been in the garage for a whole 37 seconds

Petition to serve pickles with more food than just sandwiches. Pizza? Soup? Salad? Tacos? Bbq? Why are we gatekeeping our own joy like this?!

When my social battery runs out seven minutes into the function

Omg not now, Astronomers!

We have a souvenir flag from Medieval Times that we keep inside our front door, and if one of us is having a bad day, we put it at half-staff when we get home, that way the other knows as soon as *they* get home and can adjust accordingly and this is a very good system indeed

Cream cheese on my steering wheel but same

Pro tip: if you don’t check your mail often enough, you get to spend a little chunk of January 24th standing in your kitchen feeling the light inside you die a little with each Christmas card you open

Now that we’ve all had a month to digest the year, I want you all to stop and think about whether you really want to throw an April Fool’s Day into this mix

Honestly I don’t wanna see *one* more new podcast until these guys have one

me: babe. Babe. BAAAABE!!! husband: omg WHAT?! me: the dog is doing something cute 👉👈

They should let you electronically eavesdrop on other tables at restaurants but the more you listen to another table the more of their tab you have to pay

Don’t invite me to your Super Bowl party unless this is the vibe