He's old and he's sullen

It was the only place we could get a FUCKING SIGNAL!

Keir, are those trainers you're wearing? You're the leader of the opposition not a fucking playgroup assistant!

Quite, quite mad.

But have you ever cleaned up your own mother's piss?

Yeah, sorry Keith. Keir. Yeah, get used to Keith.

Professor. Yeah, get used to "et al."

He's about as connected as a kibbutz.

I'm just a lad from Leeds with a lust for life. I'm a husband, I'm a lover, I'm a carpenter, I'm a cook, I'm a flautist - a flautist, I play the flute - and I dabble in the Irish bodhran.

Can't wait 🙌

Oh, it's very rude, that is, isn't it?

You've got a pretty fucking horsey face, and a bit of a horsey wife.

Gareth is doing the best he can.

Call me JD, I've rebranded.

I turn off all my devices at six. After that it's me, the Kindle and the Koran.

You didn't say you had black friends did you?

Quiet Bat People

That's really fucking quality fucking explosive sarcasm you're lobbing at them, mate. Boom!