I am stage 4 but stable, so I don't want to complain, BUT... I am so tired all of the time. Some days it is all I can do to get dressed and do one job in the house. I have not had immuno for 10 months. Why am I not bouncing back? Am I expecting too much from 'stable'?

Me, my water bottle, and my klonopin, are on the way top get brain and body scans. Just another day in the life....

I do it all the time, I’m a cancer patient. Where’s my money? #thankscancer

How about that?

MY CT AND MRI RESULTS HAVE NOT POSTED YET.... That is in caps because my brain is screaming it...

people who suffer from anxiety tend to rewatch the same tv shows all over again because we already know how it’s going to end therefore it creates a sense of safety/comfort and that's the reason why we keep rewatching them.

Running amok sounds fun, except for the running part. Can one stroll amok?

So. I saw the onc today. Nothing new but scarring in the brain, and all tumors (lungs, liver, lymph) relatively the same size. Small, new, 6MM lesion on my pancreas. Will PET/CT it soon to see what it is. Not exactly the win-win gold star I am used to. I guess a tie-tie is ok...

Time to retreat to the hibernacle!

Some days the side effects of my brain tumor and the scars left behing from surgery/radiation are more aparent than others. My hands shake, I have trouble typing, and I can't see well out of my right eye. Huge depression on these days. Wonder if it is the chicken or the egg?

I am grateful that I have life insurance, but it is sobering to know that I am worth more dead than alive. My eventual death will make a huge finacial impact on my kids (pay for their college loans). I feel good about that - and a bit sick at the same time... #cancer #melanoma

I have cancer and it gives me anxiety sometimes. I take Klonopin when I start to have panic attacks or when stuff get overwhelming. Turns out it works great for the days before an election, too!!

The fact that this could be, might be, my last election, makes me want to get it especially right for the future. Kinda like I will be here affecting things even when I am not if I pick a leader that would do things 'my way' and stands for what I believe in.