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Two french 75s and a nap

This ad is making me feel several types of sadness

we love grandmas house 🥹

wanna make a choose your own adventure book where they happy ending is where you accept your place in hell

Nothing ever happens

I use em dashes because they’re beautiful to me and I will never stop!!!

keep thinking “I’m spaced out and extra clumsy rn because I’m stressed“ but I’m genuinely starting to be worried there is something wrong with my brain

New phone came in the mail. Bummer. It’s been nice to have that as an excuse

can nathan fielder please reherse this

should not have told coworker that i got a new phone. welcome back 8pm texts

snacks are becoming a cry for help (panko crumbs in a ramekin with some olive oil and salt and pepper)

does anyone know when it stops feeling crushing