peter: say goodbye to the peter parker you know and love, for today is the day i forever change! mj: are you finally growing a mustache? peter: no... ʸᵒᵘ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ᶦ ᶜᵃⁿ’ᵗ ᵈᵒ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵃⁿᵈ ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᶜʳᵘᵉˡ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒ ᵏᵉᵉᵖ ᵇʳᶦⁿᵍᶦⁿᵍ ᶦᵗ ᵘᵖ. [swamp man pete 🍄]

aunt may: something weird happened today mj: what? aunt may: somebody left a bag of ash at the front door with a note “this belongs to you”. mj: that’s weird. what did you do with it? aunt may: what do you think? it’s in the cat’s litter box. [ m ]

loki: :( peter: ʷʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ʷʳᵒⁿᵍ, ᵐʳ. ˡᵒᵏⁱ? loki: I think everyone still hates me. I’ve done horrible things peter: ʷʰᵃᵗ?! ᴵ ˡᵒᵛᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗʰᵒᵘᵍʰ, ᵐʳ. ˡᵒᵏⁱ!! peter: ᵒʰ ʸᵉᵃʰ! ᴵ’ᵛᵉ ᵈᵒⁿᵉ ʰᵒʳʳⁱᵇˡᵉ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵍˢ ᵗᵒᵒ. ᴵ⁻ᴵ ʲᵃʸʷᵃˡᵏᵉᵈ ᵒⁿᶜᵉ loki:

ya yeet ya

SSTOP x.com/picturesfoider…

kitty

peter: ᴴᵉʸ ᴹʳ.ˢᵗᵃʳᵏ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵉᵉⁿ ᵐʸ ᴷᵃᶻᵒᵒ? tony: your what? peter: ᴹʸ ᴷᵃᶻᵒᵒ tony: oh that, i threw it out peter: ʸᴼᵁ ᵀᴴᴿᴱᵂ ᴵᵀ ᴼᵁᵀ? [part 1]

tony: didn't i just say i did? tony: oh wait tony: KID DON'T YOU DARE SUMMON MORE KAZOOS peter: ʸᴼᵁ ˡᵉᶠᵀ ᴹᴱ ⁿᵒ ᶜʰᵒᶦᶜᴱ ᵐʳ.ˢᵗᴬʳᴷ peter: ᴵ ˡᶦᵏᴱ ᵀᴼ ˢᴵᴺᴳ,ᴰᵃᴺᶜᴱ,ᵖʳᴱᵀᴱⁿᵈ ᵃᴺᴰᴰᴰᴰᴰ ᴷᴬᶻᴼᴼᴼᴼᴼᴼ [ @PatisHighHopes ]

"I have ten kazoos on hand right now."

:/ "I'm bored."

(( headcanon: peter unironically listens to vocaloid songs, he knows all the words but doesn’t understand them 👌

oof

❝Mʏ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ɪꜱ Bᴜᴄᴋʏ.❞ ☆ wιɴɢed αυ ☆ eхperιeɴced wrιтer ☆ мιrrored lιтerαcy ☆ тrιɢɢerιɴɢ coɴтeɴт ☆ ɢαy αѕ нell ☆ ѕнιpѕ w/cнeм