Hey look guys, I’m reading

Would you invite me in?

“Fed is best” I whisper to myself, wolfing down a $48 pack of cheezits from the minibar

Wanna take me out tonight?

Rushed to put the plants out in the rain and really messed up his day.

My baby rooster is learning how to crow from the neighbor rooster and unfortunately they are both morons so now we are all awake

No but you see, by purchasing $400 worth of tools for a project someone would’ve charged $400 for, I have saved $400.

Personality hire in disguise

Insanely lucky break that animals like to be pet. Really not much you could do with most of them otherwise. But I've got hands and you like to have the top of your head touched, looks like we're in business

It came up in a booking, and I guess I just want everyone to know that everybody in any kind of body deserves to feel pleasure. It doesn't matter if you're thin, fit or fat. If it's consensual please, please know you can indulge. :(

Ready to drive distracted?

Horse girl mantra.

Do you like when your girl cooks steak?

Love my new haircut 🥰

I don’t ignore your emails baby, I just get distracted

One of my most Pisces takes is that I don’t like all those cooking videos where they’re throwing the food together. Why are you being mean to a taco? 🥺

Oops