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If we're cool with the government putting people on lists can we also document all of you that can't utilize a traffic circle correctly

steve zahn should have been the biggest comedy star in the western world

Gotta be one of my favorite hot mic moments of all-time. We love an accountable king.

What I find funny about Taskmaster in the first game is that his boss fight is only hard if you actually did amazing in his challenges and did a bunch of different attacks/moves in em But his fight is a fucking cake walk if you do his challenges poorly and spam the same attacks

person who is definitely not in crisis: yeah i think i wanna go to ireland soon

just out of nowhere had one of the best regular days of my life that started with the barista giving me my coffee free thus solidifying my status as a regular, and ended with some intel that someone who wronged me is quite possibly not doing that great in their life. look at god

It rules being in the last generation to learn anything in an already disturbingly illiterate time. If you’re a book-reader born before 1997 you get to be a genius for the rest of your life

it can be sooooo healing to stay up until 3am. unfortunately it will also completely ruin your life

they nailed Ellie n Nora’s confrontation in the show like wow #TheLastOfUs

Pharmaceutical companies: “Okay, plan’s ready to go, ready to murder millions of people, there’s only one step left…the clues.”

“Bottom 60%” is a funny way of saying the majority.

Don’t know how much more I can even fucking take honestly. One hop this time

We're putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday and we're not gonna tell you about it until Tuesday

I miss the alamo

The only metrics that matter

We'll see you at the 𝘾𝙊𝙍𝙑𝘼𝙇𝙇𝙄𝙎 𝙎𝙐𝙋𝙀𝙍 𝙍𝙀𝙂𝙄𝙊𝙉𝘼𝙇!

even if for no other reason, you should support public transit simply because most people do NOT belong behind the wheel of a motor vehicle

this is like kendrick vs drake but with two drakes

New Rothstein banger just dropped