sexual awakening

I usually forget to pee after sex but I always cry

As someone who doesn't identify as a short person, this one was tough for me. Couldn't type because countertop was so high. Had to ask for pillows to sit on. Humbling af

What did beavers do to become the face of biodiversity

Dirty talk is just trying too hard to prove you like sex

I wonder what my ancestors had nightmares about my recurring nightmares are me dropping my phone in water or accidentally liking someone's Instagram post from 2012

So happy the arrows in the grocery stores stopped Covid 19

I hate leftovers which is really inconvenient because I'm poor

Randomly in the mood for someone to send me 1000 dollars

Every stroller I dodge on Roncesvalles inches me closer to moving

Free bleeding in my Uber

Been doing a lot of restorative yoga (sleeping)

Growing up in London ontario if you didn't regularly quote Fubar they kicked you out

Horny is a spectrum

I can't wait to show my future children the music video to Sorry by Justin Bieber

Hey babe can you send me some phony manic nudes

I want to be a mom but I'm ttooo DUMB I can't even put Lego together n shit

Good news for me!!!!! My 31 yr old bf has started to buy fruit loops every week!!!!!

Blonde hair with dark eyebrows usually means condoms are optional