men love to dump a mostly empty bag of chips into their mouth like they’re drinking it

life is just a cycle between yap o’clock and nap o’clock

babe are you ok? you’ve barely been providing shareholder value

I need LGA to start having direct flights to SFO so I never have to go to EWR again in my life

signed a lease, so brexton and I are officially moving to NYC this summer🗽

please be our friend

crash course on interop with Hyperlane ⏩ 🩷💙

ft anthony spezzano ⏩️

new ick unlocked: eclipse glasses

witnessed someone using their apple vision pro to watch the eclipse i hate it here

something very wholesome about everyone out on the street in NYC literally cheering for the eclipse

modern romance is my bf telling me he plans to propose “sometime in Q4”

oh?

“I know that quake might have shaken things up, but let’s not that tectonic shift shift our focus! it’s still a work day!”

ok important poll…when there are no seat protectors in a public restroom, do you:

a: use toilet paper to line the seat
b: raw dog it
c: squat

please reply. thank you

would be really great if it could stop raining in new york

bay area bf has discovered the NYC subway

g(y)m

stopped tweeting for a week and i have reply guys in my DMs doing a wellness check

i’m loyal to my hairdresser because we have a pact that if I EVER ask her to cut bangs again she’ll slap me in the face