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new obsession: google image search results for "black metal christmas"

this is the guy in control of your healthcare, civil rights & national security x.com/realDonaldTrum…

WHAT THE FUCK, THIS CAN'T BE REAL RIGHT??? x.com/VICE/status/88…

pffft no it's not a wallet chain, it's hooked to my fidget spinner

still can't stop thinking about Okja

quick shoutout to my dude that broke a tooth on an old KFC Zinger

not many things make you feel older than having to explain to a 20 year old who Missy Elliott is

"she used to rap while wearing trash bags and caution tape"

just walked out of the bathroom & my fiance shows me this pic, I asked where she saw it & she said "I searched 'Guy Fieri USA'"

Smash Mouth's "All Star" is 18 years old. that song can legally buy cigarettes and join the military

goats are basically an irl video game clipping glitch

anyone else have recurring nightmares of not getting texts out in stressful time dependent situations because of autocorrect fucking up

excerpt from my resume: "dropped out of college but I've read like TONS of Snapple lids"

about to take a bomb-ass shower

I am extremely disappointed I didn't come up with this first, extremely my brand in a nutshell. possible next tattoo x.com/mikethedevine/…

pharmacist asked the standard "any questions?" when I picked up my antacid & I said "pshh I'm not an idiot, crush them all up & snort it"

still wondering why the fuck there's a snapchat cookie cutter in my house & where my fiance even got it

isn't it weird how every time Mitch McConnell enters a room everyone hears the Darth Vader theme without any music playing

still one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life x.com/snazzmania/sta…