Can we please abolish the lyrical trope of "forgot to take my pills"

Dont drink with boomers.

Day 10 of coronavirus isolation, what crafts should I order on amazon prime? Literally going crazy...

amazon.com/Pre-Printed-Cr… someone buy me this

amazon.com/Harry-Potter-K… someone buy me this

Should I smash all my glasses and dishware to make mosiacs?

amazon.com/Painting-Embro… someone buy me this

The covid shutdown in Seattle isnt all bad, few of us just got promoted to full time studio musicians!

I implore everyone isolating from coronavirus to hop on chat roulette and lessen the frequency of penises. 🍆

Seattle music is gonna be sooo lit when isolation is over, it's so inspiring to see everyone dedicate their uninhibited time to writing and creating!

This Donald J. Trump speech is what would happen if an orange Wario took over for Dr Mario after dropping out of high school and getting a medical education from his eccentric aunt when she was sipping martinis during cocktail hour.

Studying palmistry rn

Isolation is tough, I'll be like 'I'm gonna get in shape like ppl in jail' then I come to and I'm on the couch with my hand in a bowl of popcorn mixed with cheetos watching Tiger King...

Laying out my back to the world outfit like I used to before the first day of school

I think the real victim rn is Social Distortion's SEO

Lawmakers in more than 20 states have considered bills this year to make the disciplinary records of police officers public or to share them with other agencies, a push that comes amid a rash of high-profile deaths at the hands of law enforcement. st.news/2ScxqAc

Can I just give a big f*ck you to MAGA for making me leave all my non-MAGA red hats on a shelf in fear that people will think they're MAGA hats if I wear them in public. 🖕

Tag a friend that smoked salvia out of PBR cans in the 2006-2010 era and now is like "Im not gonna get vaccinated, who knows what they put in that stuff!"

Kevin (McCarthy) Can F*ck Himself