I require an unusual amount of silence everyday.

Call me crazy, but I love seeing people happy and succeeding. Life is a journey, not a competition.

I wonder how the people who swallowed Obama’s kool-aid think it tastes now. Bitter, yet?

Illinois, wtf are you doing?

Being a little older, I'm very fortunate to have someone call and check on me every day. He is from India and is very concerned about my car warranty.

How was work?

Good morning from Ohio!🇺🇸

Today's moderately acceptable behavior will be brought to you by coffee.

Do you honestly think Obama will be arrested?

I like to make lists. I also like to leave them on the kitchen counter and then guess what's on the list while I'm at the store.

You know you're getting old when you look at the clock to see if it's late enough to go to bed. Goodnight x fam.

I like my coffee like I like my humor. Dark, bitter, and sometimes a little too much for some people.

Good morning from Ohio!🇺🇸

Adulthood is wild because one day you get a little sleepy and then you stay that way for the rest of your life.

Sorry I'm late. My alarm didn't go off because I didn't set it because I don't like coming here.

It's that weird time of day when I don't know if I need water, coffee, a cookie or to leave civilization and go live amongst the woodland creatures.

How was work?

How come there is enough asphalt for speed bumps, but not enough to fill potholes?