I’m excited that on Sunday we’ll be able to watch football without the most transphobic shit every other commercial.

I've never received so many prayers from atheists.

UK exit polls: bing bong, here’s the prime minister US exit polls: is it better to be loved or feared? Give your answer to the nearest cubit

What can I do so I never have to see you again?

One hour from now… “MEN! KAMALA HARRIS WILL MAKE PENISES ILLEGAL! YOU HAVE TO VOTE RIGHT NOW!”

Like welfare fraud

i’ve been going through a rough time lately and it urged me to remind those of you who are also struggling that you’re not alone in your fight to regain yourself. there are people everywhere, in all walks of life who are aligned with you in a similar fight. what’s important is to

Be a light. Love and raise your children to love. Have empathy. Take care of your mental and physical health. Try hard and do the best you can, things are rarely ever just handed to you.

The The Farmer's Dog ad that starts with "I'll always take care of you" makes my heart crumble every time. We don't deserve dogs.

Rogue One / Andor widely considered Disney's best SW content... Disney: MOAR SKYWALKERZ

This is all so corny. Dude acting like he’s fighting a 20 something year old Tyson. 🤦‍♂️ All I hope is Mike catches him with one that puts him out. Can’t stand this dude.

If u are a casual golfer not playing tournaments, and I can’t stress this enough, do whatever u want. This game sucks and is impossible. Just have fun

Do any of these betting sites have a line on Mike Tyson knocking Jake Paul's head clean off? That is what I want to see, so that is what I want to bet.

So no Twitter is dropping an ad in my timeline every time I stop scrolling to view an interesting tweet. Cool. I mean, if you want me to leave, just say so…

Horror show… #MattGaetz #TrumpCabinet

Yikes

Matt Gaetz saving face by telling friends he just wanted to spend more time with other people’s kids

I would pay Some amount of real American dollars for this hoodie. Even if Arthur Blank models it like a corpse