Well, I've certainly had better birthdays. But I'm thrilled that mum has come through her surgery today and is out of recovery and back on the ward. Best. Present. Ever. I'm now driving home, where I shall be cracking open my new whisky and toasting her road to recovery! 🥃x

Decisions, Decisions 🤔 Cheers all! 😘💕

Afternoon all! Just popping in to say a huge thank you to you all for your lovely messages of support for mum. She's given me permission to post this pic of her now she's back home 😊

My husband gave me a silver bracelet for my birthday and insisted I wore it as it had once belonged to his grandmother. ❤️ I proudly wore it for 3 days before noticing it was engraved with "Do Not Resuscitate" Morning all! 😁x

Nipped into the supermarket yesterday, picked up some cat food, a bar of chocolate and a bottle of rosé wine. The chap on the till said, "I bet you're single" Amazed, I said "You can tell that from my shopping?" "No" he replied. "It's because you're very ugly" Morning all x

I'm certainly not a natural or graceful dancer... But the minute I step in dog crap, I can moon walk better than Michael Jackson! Morning all! 😁x

Whoever coined the phrase, "Out of sight, out of mind," has never had a large spider disappear in the bedroom. 😫 Morning all! x

🪳TICK WARNING🪳 Please share this warning! If someone comes to your door saying they're checking for ticks due to warm weather, then they ask you to strip naked and dance around... IT'S A SCAM, DON'T DO IT!! I wish I'd seen this yesterday. I feel so silly now. Morning all x

On the advice of my doctor, I recently swapped my morning coffee to freshly squeezed orange juice. My mood is brighter, and I now have a real zing in my step. The doctor says it's the extra vitamin C. Personally, I think it's the glug of vodka I chuck in. Morning all! 😁x

I find it so annoying when people smugly announce, "I don't need alcohol to have a good time." Well, I don't need trainers to go running in... but it f**kin' helps! Morning all! 😁x

Did you know that during sex, you can burn off the same amount of calories as a 5 mile run? I want to know who the hell can run 5 miles in 30 seconds? Morning all! 😁x

How are you all getting on with getting "summer beach body" ready? Because mine is looking like I've got a great personality! Morning all! 😁x

My husband is furious with me just because I used his toothbrush! I don't get his problem? How else was I supposed to get the dog crap out of the sole of my trainers? 🤷🏼‍♀️ Morning all! 😁x

Took a shortcut through the cemetery on my run this morning. Spotted a chap squatting by one of the graves, so I called out, "Morning." "No." He shouted back. "I'm taking a crap" 😱 Morning all! 😁x

Somebody once told me that if I held a Shell up, I could hear the sea. All it got me was 8 years for armed robbery! 🤷🏼‍♀️ Morning all! 😁x