I'm fighting demons (heartburn)

Why doesn't my bank let me know when I'm out of my overdraft instead of when I'm in it? Always focusing on the negatives not the positives; send me some fucking smiley emojis cunts

The big bad wolf after seeing this

The families he's on about

*Opens tiktok* 'And when I'm back in chica-'

Four cancelled lessons this week already and it's fucking Monday🙃

Not sure when I'd be out in the jungle temu but okay

Don't you just love when you have a good day for once and your family just shit all over it

Can't remember the last time I pet a cat

Big tesco

Re watching the philosophers stone and that troll is a pure nonce, all the unoccupied rooms he could of meandered into and he ends up in the girls toilets with Hermione? fucking predator

Since when did skate turn into Ticketmaster?

Nearly fucking decked it in the Travelodge shower, I'd say what a horrible way to go that would have been, but it's probably on brand for me

Misplace the scourer and you'll be there days looking for the cunt

Joe marler now #TheTraitors

The bad people have found us