Cool thing about dating at my age is that you realize that being alone forever is not the worst option

I used to love this app. It was part of my identity. It kept me sane through lockdown and beyond. But I changed, and the way I wanted to use it changed. So now I'm mainly just an observer. A grazer of others' words and thoughts. And that's OK. But. I want Twitter back.

It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.

Absolutely perfect.

Why is it called Cornwall and not “pasty duchy on the left hand side”?

The sun was out just now, and for a few moments I forgot it was October.

Captain's log: August 4th. Still no rain. It's been 12 hours. 3 loads of panic washing are on the line. The grass is cut. The future looks bright, until tomorrow ⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️

Just had a dispatch notification from Not on the High Street. It's on its way (from within the UK) and should arrive by 25th August. How the fuck is it getting here?

What a beautiful day for a trip to the hairdressers!

Spicy prawns, pickled slaw. 10/10 would smash again

Wonder if I can get this past him indoors...

Him indoors is on his way home from a long weekend of racing. 🚴‍♀️🚴‍♀️🚴‍♀️ I've made bread, and a key lime pie, his beers are chilling in the fridge, and I've ordered an Indian. Other treats are planned 😉 #WifeMaterial

Today is International Cat Day. Expect all cats to strut around like we own the place, so the same as every day really.

Like every day isn't #InternationalCatDay

Lunatic

Hey Ryanair, my parents who are in their 70s and 80s, had accidentally downloaded the return flight boarding card instead of the outgoing ones and you charged them £110 to print them at the airport. £110 for 2 pieces of paper which took 1 minute. Shame on you

This feels unlikely as I'm such a small account, but if anyone has a #BlueskyInvites going spare, I'd like one 🤞