I felt compelled this evening to say yes Donald J. Trump you’re an ass hat. You represent the worst America has to offer and you’re leadership is a lie. You’re clearly a shitty leader to say the least.

Wanted to reiterate because it’s important, Donald J. Trump is a jackass undeserving of our attention and grace. He has shit on the very tenants of religion and deserves his punishment for his willful ignorance. #bible #christianity #fucktrump #fuckface for good measure.

I recently learned having blue eyes means your iris can be actually pretty thin meaning you kind of see in light leaks

I was going to eat a bowl of sprinkled donut cereal and thought why do dishes and ate frosted animal cookies instead.

What a game. I think the super bowl is going to be hard pressed to out do that one.

Can you imagine how much tofu I would eat if tofu tasted like fruity pebbles?

Still waiting to hear more about Mexico pledging to donate thousands of bottles of Corona to Flint, MI from The Onion

I may have just consumed the greatest scrambled eggs I've made to date

Since Apple Music has hit the scene Spotify has stepped their game up substantially

@Suburbanuat the same reason Trump is winning

@AppleMusicHelp I can't get an album I've imported into iTunes to play on my iPhone. It doesn't show in my iCloud library

My version of the purge is cleaning out the break room fridge at the end of the night

@Suburbanuat when you toss a piece of glass Tupperware into the garbage few things make you feel more rich and powerful

The gym was pretty dead this morning. Apparently St. Bro's day went off without a hitch.

My favorite way to access Google maps is through Bing search

@Suburbanuat because I remember what they did to Emilio Esteves

@redferriswheel are you trying to say we're basically Carson Daly?

That new overtime bill better have come with a no blackout date clause or I might be looking for a new overtime rewards card.

Here's my full letter to the Trump administration's Kris Kobach denying his request for personal information of every registered PA voter.

Ready for pizza and a scary movie with Amazon Video 🎃 #UnlimitedScreaming via Fooji