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Devastating personal news. I've had some tummy troubles for the last couple weeks, so I cut back on cheese and other dairy products and I almost immediately feel a difference. How dare my body betray me in this manner?

This is how I feel when I take Jersey transit to Atlantic City

Happy to help. Calling in that I've so many illegal aliens in Centralia, Pennsylvania. Don't wikipedia Centralia, Pennsylvania.

He may not have been a very good rapper, but he got a couple of bars.

I was thinking about the last days before summer in elementary school this week, and I brought something up to my husband. He looked at me like I was insane. Did y'all have a day before the last day of school where you would play with shaving cream to clean your desktop?

If this cast doesn't immediately throw Michael Rappaport out of the castle, I'm not watching. Vile, disgusting little man sliming up my favorite show.

Y'all, these protests tomorrow are going to be so mild. This is going to be like "women's march" level spicy. These people are imagining protesters (who they keep saying are being "bussed in?!?) are going to torch One Liberty Place. Smdh 🙄

Need to log off for tonight. People more afraid of potential "riots" tomorrow (that won't happen unless the cops start instigating) than our neighbors being disappeared. This country is so cooked. I'm just gonna go enjoy the Phillies and try to center ✌️ love y'all

TIL Lupita Nyongo was in a Zohran music video. God bless his corny nepo baby ass 🙌

No one talks about it, but BYOB also includes tequila.

It feels like a lie, but I swear to god every week I have a new best meal of my life in Philadelphia.

What a way to wake up this morning. Late notice, on Sunday, Father's Day, to make sure no lawyers could be present. This government is sickening.

In other news, the first maypop bloomed today ♥️ Come get her, bees!

This is who runs this account btw (My profile pic is also child Sam 😅)