Me: Do you really where I was April 29th? Literally anyone: Let me guess you were at work. Me: Yes 😑

I mean...

This meme will never die and I love that #MetGala2025

I was listening to Bailey Sarian's MMM compilation about internet murders and the only thing I kept saying was, "What on earth is going on in Kansas City?!?!" like genuinely I was concerned for Kansas City both KS and MO.

Honestly, he could have told a knock-knock joke and every woman in a 50-mile radius would laugh like that because he's Charles Leclerc and that's how you laugh when a guy who looks like that makes a joke even if it isn't funny.

Happy non-anniversary to Lorelai Gilmore and Luke Danes to all those who celebrate.

I was asked if I was a John Mayer fan... the reason? "Because you're a girl and you like Taylor Swift. The two go together." Hard no.

Can I make it any more obvious...

She wrote the soundtrack to my life like it's a coming-of-age film—from ✨️glitter gel pen✨️ & heartbreak playlists to soft girl Saturday. She’s my emotional support blonde because crying to Marjorie and Clean is a personality trait. Taylor Nation 💘 #19YearsofTaylorSwift

The Brothers Karamazov sounds like either a 2010s YouTube prank channel or a podcast where three brothers just yap about life.

The fact that some Swifties just found out who Chase Rice is and the fact that he wrote Cruise has me shooketh. Also, the fact that he played at the #TightEndUniversity concert debunks my years-old theory that he and Travis Kelce might be the same person.

Hey Vogue Magazine call me... just kidding or am I?

(Whispers in a Northern Jersey accent, just kidding we don't have an accent): Hey jackantonoff can we get a Steel Train reunion someday? 👉👈

My previous statement still stands Vogue Magazine call me..

Me and probably Daniel Ricciardo right now! Nico Hülkenberg

"I asked ChatGPT" "I asked Grok" oh yeah well I asked my mom and she said she could pick us up if your mom drops us off.

Serious question for My Chemical Romance If life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing?

My inner monologue since forever has been "And, baby, that's show business for you" or some variant of that phrase... Taylor Swift have I been an Easter Egg for #tsthelifeofashowgirl all this time?

I'm calling it here first: #tsthelifeofashowgirl, Debut (Taylor's Version), Reputation (Vault Tracks), Karma (Taylor's Version), and a documentary.

I still vividly remember how much they hyped up the Metallica episode