Im definitely a “i think ur lying but okay” type of person

imagine thinking you could shiver my timbers

Job applications be like "Wyd If You See Mark Crying" Bro Ima Keep Working

Them: “you need to have breakfast” Me: *holding up a redbull and a vape* “I am?”

snapchat be like “a year ago today u thought this red flag was ur soulmate”

"I'm just resting my eyes" me actually passing out 5 min later:

i cut family off too, idgaf find another member btch

Coworker: You look so mean. Me: I am, move.

Every time I check the time at work, it be the same damn minute

People just be sitting in my friend requests: 2w 24w 52w 2y 3y 😂🤣

dont text me after 9pm asking me what im doing big mama is in bed 📷

me in my room disassociating from the world

If ur A/C stays on 66-70, don’t invite me to that igloo u live in 🥶😭😂

Every time I turn around it's time to go to work AGAIN 💀🤣

WE OUTSIDE THIS SUMMER ‼️ after work though…

The last look at my bed before leaving for work...

The way my baby daddy act I see why Father's Day is in Pride month

A woman can cheat emotionally and call it 'closure.' A man cheats once and he’s the devil. Make it make sense

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class

You ever broke up with a man and your whole family was relieved