Sometimes it’s the little things that can be the death of you... #protectyourneck #gethealthy #dungeonsanddragons #fakenews buff.ly/2wygeqE

Praying for something implies that, despite My omniscience, I don't already know what you want. Prayer insults Me.

I mean come on, if it didn't happen on Twitter did it really even happen? #TweeterInCheif #TrumpTweets #FakeNews buff.ly/2EQgrdD

Does anyone ever think of the person on the other side of that song...what about them?!?!? #Lola #SheWasAShowgirl #Music #FakeNews buff.ly/2KobdJH

And I thought your mother raised you better. You should always be courteous and polite to anyone listening to you...even if you don't know they are there! #Amazon #Alexa #NSA #IHeardThat #GoldenRule #FakeNews buff.ly/2Z5i0fi

“Hello, young people,” Joe Biden said on his first broadcast. “I am excited to shake hands in this Fortnite game. Which button does that?” #Fortnite #Gamer #Biden2020 #JoeBiden #YoungPeople #Twitch #FakeNews buff.ly/2EVcsfQ

Attendants required each passenger to consume three to five shots of Jägermeister before being allowed to board. This plan lead to Animal House – level hijinks. #FriendlySkies #ComeFlyWithMe #Vacation #FakeNews buff.ly/2WqgfMZ

“His Grace (Martin) is not seeing anyone at the moment,” reported a fan, dressed as Tyrion Lannister and walking around on his knees. “He is currently in the midst of selecting a Hand to serve him.” #GoT #GameOfThrones #GoTFinale #FakeNews buff.ly/2Zg1vNC

“While the Vice President and I certainly have our differences,” Said Ocasio-Cortez. “We both endorse the conclusions of this report and the use of internet mob violence to help reform our broken and unjust society.” #MobJustice #TwitterTroll #FakeNews buff.ly/2wOEwx2

“Fortunately, there was so much confusion, after it was over, I just slipped in with the rest of the troops!” he smiled. “No one was the wiser!” #NotAllHeros #Coward #WarIsHell #FakeNews buff.ly/2WvX9Ah

“I offered to help him move” said longtime friend John Pabich. “He just told me it was OK, he didn’t have much stuff and that everything he needed fit in his van.” #Homeless #StarvingArtist #Musician #TourLife #FakeNews buff.ly/2KOgcmY

“I’ve never played a game where I have to lecture people,” complained a reviewer on IGN. “My character is still lives with his parents and complains on Twitter. Who is this game for?” #CallOfDuty #E3 #SocialJusticeWarrior #FakeNews buff.ly/2WCI3ch

“It’s political satire,” Leslie Jones said, defending the decision after her ten-minute treatise on natural born citizenship. “Sometimes you don’t laugh at comedy, you just think.” #SNL #PoliticalHumor #UsedToBeFunnier #FakeNews buff.ly/2FdIcg8

"An injustice occurred today,” said the union’s president. “Modern aircraft basically fly themselves these days & our members have a right to entertain themselves while helming an aluminum tube at 35,000 feet." #VideoGames #Gamer #FriendlySkys #FakeNews buff.ly/2FihT8F

“I’d like to believe,” said Donaldson. “It would be nice just to have sex and not get into some kind of complicated relationship. But every time I contact one of these women, they end up being a bot." #OKCupid #Tinder #Catfish #MailOrderBride #FakeNews buff.ly/2IQVJLM

I can not believe FedEx is still in business considering how #awful their customer service is. Driver skips my house and says he came for a delivery but my #RingDoorbellCam tells another story!!! #getyouracttogether FedEx Help FedEx Public Affairs FedExForum #WishTheyUsedUPS

Just when I thought customer service couldn’t get worse I had to call H&M Customer Service THE WORST SERVICE ON THE PLANET!!!! They send me someone else’s order (which took 3 weeks by the way) and now they want me to wait while they “investigate” way to tell a customer #WEDONTCARE H&M USA

Our friends over at Poker Punx have started a new poker vlog…it isn’t funny yet but I’m sure he’ll make a fool out of himself at some point. youtube.com/channel/UCpFwh…

⚡️⚡️ Gino Rahul Garg Dani Federico Carlo Farias Guajardo Ʀᴀɴᴅᴏ ㄩɴɪᴠᴇʀꜱɪᴛʏ Bender2041 MD ARMAN Kamal Middya youyou.lens （✸，✸） Davis Mwambo 小qiang John Gagnet 💎🙌🍿 Arnau Jordana @Patient_Spc Alaric Wimer