just yawned in the club

If you're using AI to write essays, eulogies, a text to your wife, I do think less of you as a person. Ceding your mental and creative abilities to a machine is an embarrassing thing and people should be ashamed to admit doing it in public.

mind if a white boy speaks a little espanõl tonight #cervaza

hey can we hit up the checkout line at TJ maxx? i need some weird jelly beans, a new screen protector, and about 20 disgusting sugar-free coffee syrups

a face card can carry a declined body card but a body card can never carry a declined face card

The concept of me trying to secure a summer body on August 3rd

Tom Brady was so good that growing up I used to kneel next to my bed and pray that the Patriot’s plane would explode

this beer tastes like everybody wants to know how i feel about israel

now i don't like saying the word "objectively" in music because objectivity doesn't exist in music. however, dance monkey might be the closest thing to an objectively dogshit song.

SOMEBODY SAID BABY'S FIRST DOOMED SHIP 😭😭😭

she hopes im cursed forever to sleep on a twin-sized mattress

serve after serve if you ask me

eating the salt in a pretzel bag

immediately thought of this diva

who has the gif of the lady acting like she has superpowers for being able to identify different beats in music 😭😭😭