Important to remember this guy's campaign promise was he was pretty much the same as Shrek and you were voting to make Shrek real

The Autism Button is an official federal mandate for citizens starting June 2025

drinking six beers and talking to my cat like

Put 👏 SWAT👏 teams 👏 in 👏 the 👏 hummus 👏 aisle

If you wear a non computer watch I will immediately assume you are in porn

Can’t stop thinking about doing the “what are you in for” talk in prison and you have to explain you purchased a competitor to the soda stream

NEW QUORATORS w/ the lovely merritt k! → What if trees could walk and talk? How would forests change? → Bats’ schlongs hang out when they are sleeping upside down. Why? → Do lobsters sleep on their backs? THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S AN ANIMAL EPISODE: youtu.be/Snv65sapsOA

What if Ben Affleck was autistic... for murder?

NYT has a conclave timer lmao

TWOAPW #188: THE MERCHWHIT OF VENICE ALEX PTAK’S TEST KITCHEN Jeremy Kaplowitz join the lads for their triumphant return to Odyssey as they throw themselves headlong into adventures of magic bats, deceitful chickens, and Edwin Blackgaard staging The Merchant of Venice.

Can Matt sleepover

My new short narrative film, THE CONFECTION -- my first horror -- will come later this year!

Yes, it's a longstanding rule that the Pope must be Catholic.

Amazing things are happening on LinkedIn

In America, nobody is allowed to sit down in public because poor people might do it too

This is going to be stuck in my head forever