just up torturin’ the ol dragonfly so to speak

good job son, you unalived that math test!!!!

boyfriends roommate just went on a generational streak of accidentally saying racial slurs he didn’t know existed

gonna pick one of you at random attach all ur limbs to different horses n then fire a gun

waiter gave us the wrong drinks when he handed them to us 😭

can i take zone out to dinner first damn ☹️

kid at work just yelled “oh yeah get pounded!!” while playing minecraft n i immediately made eye contact with my coworker looking like this

latest theory

saw a furry on the bus the other day which wouldn’t have been THAT strange had it not been 38°C outside

petah…. i’m freakin out…..

polly wanna cracker???? polly should take her out to dinner first….

WE LN DA ROOF!!!!!!!!

what if instead of the backrooms it was the living room and we all hung out and watched movies

i used to go to a private school that would make up stand up and say “welcome and good morning (name)” in unison every single time someone entered the classroom

am i mogging

insane lost & found find at work

whenever i suspect im about to pee for an unreasonably long time i like to time it

should twitter blue users all die on the dl