I do unfortunately believe that if I can’t have a bit of chocolate every day I might as well be dead

when you’re trying to make plans but all the girls are busy

When I text saying ‘fuck off’ this is how I’m saying it

have you met people ?

Him: Are you fucking stupid? Me:

I refuse to be controlled by a calendar so happy birthday to me today

I hate office small talk, how am I doing today? Same as I was when you saw me yesterday Janet, I want to fucking kill myself

Ngl I thought he meant if you were the dolphins.

My anxiety explaining the future to me at 2am.

When ads start popping up for stuff I’ve only thought about in my head

saw a man in a convertible wearing a beanie hat, how counterproductive.

Has anyone ever eaten a chocolate starfish before?

My bad, I meant star bar

I have very high hopes of being with a man who treats me sooo good even tho I'm a fckin bitch

Bought cereal for the first time in a long time and after two bowls I’m sitting in the kitchen looking at the cereal box like this. Now I remember why I stopped buying cereal.

Been laughing at this video for three days bruh lmao