Feed your dogs some blueberries

The best jokes are the ones that get you in trouble

Bill Burr had Kanye figured out back in 2017

Alligators were here before dinosaurs were. I promise you they got this. They did not need whatever help this nerd thought he was providing please go sit yo dry ass down, man

I hate QR code menus with a burning passion

I’ve got the masculine urge to remodel a bathroom

Lexi went from “no dead ducks on my wall” to “can we get these both mounted” real fast

Are dog abortions a thing?

ITS FLAT FUCK FRIDAY ROLL THE CLIP

ITS FLAT FUCK FRIDAY BABY ROLL THE CLIP

ITS FLAT FUCK FRIDAY ROLL THE CLIP BABY

Smooth criminal

There has to be a positive correlation between French bulldog ownership and cocaine use

If you can’t pull your dick out of the bottom of your shorts to piss, your shorts are too long

Married people Venmo-ing back and forth stresses me tf out

I took a tuna sandwich into a movie theater the other night. Asshole/Psychopath move I know. Just had to get that off my chest

90% of liquid death’s consumer base HAS to be recovering alcoholics

When the first sip of Modelo hits your lips