I don’t know if Christmas was more crockpot or crack pipe this year.

When it comes to me, my wife totally confuses the terms child-like and childish.

To start with an aspirational goal, I will be celebrating “dry Mondays” in January.

This industrial strength nose hair trimmer I got for Christmas is amazing.

The things in politics that people on the left or right have in common are strong confirmation bias and that they don’t know what they are talking about.

Do optimists see the tequila shot glass as full or empty?

I am on Season 25, Episode 12 of cleaning my garage.

Clearly tanks can break through the debt ceiling.

You ever ask yourself why you are asking yourself?

Trump announces Punxsutawney Phil as VP running mate.

2023 it should be called The “Animal House” of Representatives.

I just bought the last 25 Happy Valentines balloons from Kroger, tied them together and let them float to see if they get shot down.

I just tied all of my Alexa devices to a big balloon floated them over the house and shot them.

I have invented the palindrone, which looks the same flying backwards or forwards

I like to put glitter on my balls. Pretty nuts, eh?

Do you think hypochondriacs are feeling better or worse after the pandemic ended?

All I want for Christmas is new books on Atheism.

I heard that Steven Hawking likes black holes

How about this? Post the top 10 critical thinking skills in public schools.

Someone told me it was National Orgasm Day today. But it’s actually July 31st. Oh, whatever.