The hardest part of kissing a chef is their hand being in the way.

I feel like bird dawgs are just made to further help the a hot dawg is a sandwich argument. #sidewayschickensandwhich

Randomly decided to abandon the work playlist in favor of playing Green Day Now I feel like someone has to stop George Bush…I don’t know knock the brush out of his hands I guess.

Is Dr. Wiley a robot doctor or does he have his Doctorate in robotics?

When the previous generation said “….stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.” We thought they meant immediate physical abuse. Jokes on us it was a fucked economy and emotional trauma. They were playing the long game.

Getting a plus one to a wedding is like handing the keys to someone at a party. It’s a sign of trust while also saying “hey, don’t f**k this up.”

My pitch: Taika Waititi and Sacha Baron Cohen are rival spies in a action comedy about two foreign spies taking out an American dictator and while there is a femme fatale,the spies end up sleeping with each other mid-mission instead of the Bond trope.

It's that time of year where I link up with Madden NFL 26 and give away some codes! Follow (if you aren't already), RT, Like & Comment with console of choice! I'll DM the winners! I'll also be giving away some on my Twitch! Twitch.TV/TheJohnnyWrest… #Madden23 #JohnnyWrestling

As an agnostic sports allows your faith to experience crushing defeats with the upside being that you get to sleep in.

30 seconds after naming a character: Self satisfied delusions of grandeur Moments later:Wait does this name work, does any of this work ahhh this all feels like garbage. #writerbrain.

A second of work and that kid is going to be telling people about it for years. That is some cheeky heel work.

I don’t have plans to leave twitter yet but I am on the titanic with a duckie shaped innertube and water wings on. Looking out at the various awful icebergs.

Doing my first #MTGBRO sealed event, I assume I just throw everything that says destroy artifact in the deck?

I love when Celebrities sell a wrestling promo. #protectthebusiness #AEW

Having a Sesame Street in your city would be great. Your kid could run away and they’d come back educated.

Thanks to Letterkenny, now when I think of Brett Hart using Degenerate , I know he was basically calling Shawn Michales an “alleged” ostrich f-er.

Hard agree. Al Yankovic .

Grand Rapids giving a you fucked up chant to someone spitting out moonshine is the most Grand Rapids thing possible. #WWERaw

If I want to be apart of the mtg discourse it seems I need a strong opinion on battles before they are actually explained… Here is my cold take shouldn’t battles just be sagas like aren’t battles already the thing you’re doing in the first place? #mtg

Well that was whole lot of garbage. Terrible booking the last 24 hours.#RawAfterMania