"Yo is there no pop in this house?!" "Yeah there's cherry diet zero" 😂👌🏼

I've come to the conclusion that enough cheese and sour cream and save anything no matter how bad I am at cooking

#NailedIt

“We’re like Batman and Robin, but we’re Batman and Batman”

I meeeeean I don’t care what side I’m on; I just want to get drunk

“Don’t really want to break the seal” -yet I’ve drank a whole bottle of wine...

I hope my first dance at my wedding is “fireflies” by owl city

Would you judge me if I ate a whole jar of maraschino cherries in one sitting????

Don't trick yourself into thinking every day is the same routine. Every day is 24 unique hours to hustle hard, better yourself, learn something new and be grateful. We're so lucky.

I could listen to Jess Conte sing for 484636388 years and love every minute of it

I ate so many candy canes today its a problem

Spicy

Wishing you and your #SignificantOtter a Happy #ValentinesDay!

Me: "I want to lose a few pounds" Also me:

You eating again?!" Me: ......... no

#GoJetsGo