oh hell yeah

this is my mother

Normalize not knowing where your spouse is

I will absolutely not be sharing my calculator history thank you

so are we under attack or

oh that clears it up thank u

I told my husband that I did not want to exercise because I just want to get fat and die and he said “halfway there!”.

Just your regular reminder to follow Josh Duncan on Instagram because he’s so funny.

My coworker got a suspicious email, told our boss, boss said it was legit, and coworker got reported to IT for failing a phishing test.

Found out that if I do not promptly download iOS updates on my work phone that they just….turn it off.

how am I supposed to work in these conditions (hoodie weather)

I hate how funny he is

Things my dog will eat: mud, rocks, sticks, plastic bags, bones, a seat belt, socks, bars of soap, napkins Things my dog will not eat: cucumbers

Everyone jokes about getting old and adopting birdwatching as a hobby, but no one talks about obsessively checking your rain gauge.

mom is bamboozled by “alexis”

can we get Dion Dawkins a safer hobby please jesus

My husband just gasped in a way that I thought meant someone died and instead he informed me that Boo Blasters is closing at Kings Island.

guess what happened today

I have never heard such loud thunder in my life.