Celebrating a loss. Levels.

Booty call

My Saturday night will consist of taking equal measures of stool hardeners and stool softeners and seeing which one wins.

Just beautiful.

I wonder how many parents of children Marcus Rashford fed are now racially abusing him on social media?

Just when you think Green Man is only for people who wear Northern Rock and pretend to like folk music, they book Mogwai as a headliner. Getting that day ticket!

What do you call a Scotch Egg with no egg? Don’t give the obvious answer, it’s already taken.

open.spotify.com/track/2oPT7bK5… Stephen Bowler Southampton?

If I was ever going to do heroine, it would be to Take Five by Dave Brubeck.

Jazz drummers just do snare rolls to 5/4’s. #realtalk

The Olympics has baseball now? Mind blown

NOFX- stickin in my eye youtu.be/Gv4qJwiEjcU via YouTube Alex Reminds me of you cunt.

If you think drug addiction is ‘self-inflicted’, you’re part of the problem - The Independent apple.news/Aup3YJ75mSliPY…

New Rolo Tomassi album is straight fire! 🔥🤌

That’s not Theory. That’s Hypothesis.

Opened Twitter for the first time in ages just to add to the pile-on of Jake Issenberg for wanting us to tank 😂