you could cover your head in tomato sauce and fake tan and call yourself 'the baked bean'. sick.

he looks like a hitchhiker who kills prostitutes. I like him.

my first tweet was going to be that 'w' is a stupid letter. it looks like two 'v's, it should be called double v. sick.

why not make planes like Russian dolls? a plane, a helicopter, then a car, then a motorbike. ultimate vehicle. sick.

DEMONENTIA: a disease where you turn into a monster. sick.

I'd just get concrete teeth, then an operation for some massive jaw, then go around biting people's heads. sick.

I'd get my news an hour before, off BBC minus one. sick.

I know that the 'X' is for ten, but I like to think it stands for 'X MODE' and robots. sick.

prawn crackers are just like edible kitchen roll. sick.

Paper Man? More like Paper Warriors: Legend Of The Rubber. Sick.

Beef Mints, like a Polo in the shape of a cow's head. M I N T S. It's a play on words. sick.

'faceless bureaucrat'? I thought you were going to say 'faceless monster', like in that film. sick.

I'd open a school, it would teach: 'Shark Studies', 'Bullying' and hours of 'Turok 2: Seeds Of Evil'. sick.

They should call pineapples 'pain-apples'. sick.

can you imagine a cabbage demon? it would open up, like a plant monster. sick.

I'd quite like to work as a bee keeper. I'd keep honey in my pocket, not even in a jar, and I'd give it to people I met. sick.

I once asked for a burger with macaroni cheese on top. MACARONI CHEESE. best burger I've ever eaten. sick.

You know what you should call an external hard drive? The shadow zone. Sick.

I feel like when you get smoked fish at the shop. Like beef jerky. Sick.

What is binary tho? I don't understand. I'm so not 2016