Even the dogs are huddling together for warmth. Heatwave eh.

This is pretty irresponsible. Our political classes need to re-learn how to climb the hierarchy of argument; this is unpleasant name-calling unworthy of a future cabinet minister. Personally, I never want to see another '-phobe' from any politician of whatever stripe.

'I am shocked to discover that women aren't allowed to join this club that has been male-only since its foundation in 1831.'

In fairness, the inability to detect either the presence or absence of women actually explains a lot.

Journalists who have espoused gender ideology should not be surprised if their subsequent pronouncements fall on stony ground. You only need to lose your credibility once; this was the acid test of our generation and you failed.

Reminiscent of the Relief of Mafeking.

Lashings of rain necessitates lashings of custard, with an accompanying spontaneous sultana sponge pud.

The only rational explanation is that by sheer coincidence Keir Starmer's imaginary friend goes by 'Rosie Duffield'.

Dogs have realised electric blanket is off and I am now literally Dog Paul Atreides.

Changed the dog's bedding (entropy decreased, yay) and am now apparently Dog Hitler. Just waiting until they realise I've turned their electric blanket off.

This entire farrago was gestated, birthed and flourished under successive Tory administrations.

It's only in the very dying days of the current one that they are belatedly attempting to enforce the law as written rather than as activists desired.

Our bulk order of tea bags was late. Crisis in McDonnell Towers; a man can face mortality with equanamity, but is a tea-less life even worth living?

All credit to Ringtons (thank you Dawn) who turned a potential calamity into an opportunity for truly great customer service.

Good leaders lead. Bad leaders manoeuvre. Terrible leaders manoeuvre transparently.

He is a terrible liar in both senses of the word.

It's not over yet, but it's taken ten years to begin to force our wayward institutions to obey the law and cleave to evidence-based medicine.

There's a meta-scandal; none of our checks and balances worked and many organisations simply abandoned their charters for social credit.

…and are those people sat on the wrong side of the table as well Bill-sorry, Owen?

'Salad' originally meant 'salted vegetables' but it had taken on much the modern sense by Elizabethan times, and 'salad days' comes down to us from 'Anthony and Cleopatra'. Whatever the sense of it, it works really well with leftover roasties and a homemade quiche.

I've mentioned Deming before recently. Here's another favourite quote; it was originally directed at companies, but I think it's particularly apt for political parties.

“Survival is optional. No one has to change.”

Humza was installed to make his predecessor look good, much as Tiberius chose Caligula.

On that basis: mission accomplished.