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*RuPaul voice* If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna solve this maze?

Good evening folks, would you like a light show with dinner this evening?

This is a primal wine made exclusively using technology available in the Stone Age

Canned Lube™️

It frightens me that I can see psychobilly sideburns naturally emerging from my facial hair growth patterns

Lost in ur meat maze

I understood the fuck out of that sentence

I'm rooting for the 9ers today because their QB is a rambunctious lil ♑Capricorn♑. Fellas, that means he is career-motivated and focused on status.

Buzz Lightyear is a cuck

You can lead a horse to water, but if you don't say something explicit like "hey, there's some water. I'd like you to drink it," then it's your fault if you come away unsatisfied.

I thought adulthood would mean owning a lot more swords

Stochastic terrorism is the Nintendo of organized religion

Come to find, I was the hot single in my area this whole time

No microdosing at this party. We get all the way high or not at all.

Twitter bots: I will solve captchas for you if you make jokes for me

All these fuckin nerds keep telling me my shoelace is untied. Bitch I know it's called looking cool.

Eat, Solve, Spend: Food token, Treasure token, Clue token.

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