"30 seconds left on the microwave ~ Women: set table, pour drinks, tweet, talk on the phone ~ Men: do the space shuttle countdown"

For your caffeinated beverages. #HarryPotter

Pro-tip: use a blimp for your holiday shopping. Its easy to get a good parking spot.

"The Road goes ever on" That Hobbit knew what he was talking about

You cant argue with a good blowjob. - George Carlin

"also gazes into you."" Many times the abyss is inside us."

Happy Thursday everyone. Have a great day, let's start with some coffee.....

BlackBerry Announces BBM for Android Wear at #CES2015 gadgets.ndtv.com/apps/news/blac…

Pigs have orgasms that last up to 30 minutes.

Smile! Youre beautiful!