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The scariest thing I’ve seen this Hallowe’en is Robert Jenrick’s non-clapping wife.

I hate what football has become

Roy Keane in his studio knitwear this afternoon is giving off these vibes.

It’s come to this.

Ultimately it’s your vote, America, but one of your candidates is a racist convicted fraudster and proven sex offender who proved himself one of the most disastrous presidents in your history and attempted to overthrow your democracy when he lost an election. And the other isn’t.

Mel Giedroyc on BBC2. Sue Perkins on Channel 4. How have we, as a society, allowed this to happen?

Morning.

The Graham Norton Show is not a chat show. It’s a PR platform. 👎🏽

Really regretting tweeting about the overt PR horseshit of Graham Norton’s show. It’s brought all the unhinged arseholes to my yard. NB: I don’t mind Norton. Yes, I know why this happens. Yes, it’s much worse than it used to be.

Manchester United won’t have an easier 90 minutes all season. I know Cooper will try to find the positives. There weren’t any. #lcfc #MANLEI

Three tickets to see Leicester City vs West Ham on a cold mid-week night? £154.50. This is worse than £7 pints. Game’s gone.

I'm trying it out - who's there?

I don’t want to drive traffic to their site - but it’s a cat. It’s always a cat.

Went over on Tuesday. Seems ok.

Good God.

Nice to see Harry Hill is trending. Any excuse to post this classic.